I’ve been contemplating the reasons behind my yes’ and no’s that have been thrown at me lately. Yes they are necessary for my growth, and no I don’t understand most of these crazy developments. Who says I need to? This girl has learned that I won’t or can’t be given all the answers. I wouldn’t be able to handle the enormity of it all. My God knows and directs me through the answers because He can handle it. How amazing since I can’t!
I can trust Him like no one else on this earth. Even if they have the best of intentions for me. I am blessed by my select few I can confide in. One of which I told today, I am able to share certain thoughts and feelings with one or two friends, but I can’t share those with other friends. This is because my trust and comfort with one over another varies. Not judging or belittling each individual; just acknowledging that each one has different influences on me.
But now is my chance to lay all those laughs and burdens and questions and epiphanies on God’s shoulders. My trust proves that I don’t expect to be hurt by Him. I don’t have to walk on eggshells around Him with the possibility of Him using it against me. What a stress reliever! But God also brought those other individuals into my life to help me live and learn. Through it all I still get frustrated, but I’m learning to be at peace with what I can and must do each day. I can’t take on every day that’s left in my life at once, and I’m at peace with that reality.
My Beauty From These Ashes 